DrillsAndSkills.com

[stella!]

in 10 years i have had about a couple of handful of complaints,( and nothing serious). i have been coaching, (seriously ) for about 8 years. this year i have found an entire group graduating into the 13/14/15 year age group. i can remember how "awful" my life was at this time. however, i have a kid that is trully miserable. she won lev 6 state...way talented...very quick to learn..., but she is that "woe is me" kid. she's almost impossible...like a brick wall. i have tried everthing. SERIOUSLY!!! now im the problem because i dont pay her as much attention as i used to, even though i pay her more attention than anyone else...you can only talk to a wall for so long. i cant praise a brick wall anymore. this is not only affecting her, she is starting to bring down other kids. i am on top of that but i cant do it all...has this happened to you...what do you do....i know this age sucks but....aaarrrggghhh!!!! i can't quit over it...and i know i can't strangle...hahahaha...
i have involved parents....they don't know either.

[Coach Blair]

Ohh, the preteen-teen years. That's hell really. No matter how distracting they can be from the 6-10 age it's just downhill from 11 at times it seems.
Choose your poison.
I know exactly what you're talking about. We have one girl who just turned 11 who has always been a perfectionist. If anything it's stalled her progress and in 2 years she has become better about it, but it can be a real drag at times. Then again I was the same way, until I became a slacker and learned how to chill out about it.
I'd have to say I've helped her a little about it but not nearly enough. At least she has gotten to the point where she will try to work through it. It used to be real bad when she was just a L3. She still gets frustrated at how tight her back and shoulders in limber movements. Grr.
_________________
Glorify strength. "It is only by becoming stronger that a man can realize his divinity."

[stella!]

problem is this kid is really talented. i dont work in a "hard core" gym. she could be really really good but i wonder how much i can take...she would not last a second in a "hard core"gym. so since i can;t slap her what do i do....shes to good to give up on, but shes getting to the point where i cant be around her...
"

[Coach Blair]

I as well don't work in a HC gym. I'm not sure I'm really up for it. Part of me is, part of me isn't. Sometimes I think we do need to be a bit more HC, but then according to the goals the team sets they do make them for the most part. Ehhck.
Positive, positive, positive. Till you get sick of being positive. Being a coach isn't about you, it's about them. Whenever I start thinking it's me, it's time to take a step back and remember it's for them. Well moreso than myself. Kids > adults. That still doesn't mean we have to not to take care of ourselves.
Regardless part of gym is leaving the **** of your life at the door. Toss it in your locker for later. It's part of why I like gym.
_________________
Glorify strength. "It is only by becoming stronger that a man can realize his divinity."

[flipper82]

I can definitely relate to this topic. Recently, on my team of 6 level 7's, 1 level 6 and 1 5, two level 7's quit.

The first level 7 to quit did so because she wouldn't/couldn't do what she needed to do. This kid was fine on all events except bars (which in my opinion is what made her quit). One day she would complete her warmup of kip handstands but on the next she couldnt do one. In my mind this meant she wasnt trying as hard as she was on the days when she was doing them and to me as Im sure it is to other coaches, this is not acceptable. I finally resorted to kicking her off bars if she took too long and I guess she got tired of this. I understand as a kid this was embarassing and hard to take but I was hoping it would make her work harder.

Anyway, when she quit she took another kid with her. This kid had a lot of talent but a crappy attitude (not a good combination!). I overheard her telling another gymnast that if the her friend quit she would too and I did not hesitate in telling her that if she really felt like that she should quit because I don't want kids on my team who will quit because someone else does. This sport is too hard to be doing it for someone else. I see that you really have to want to be there and want to learn in order to be successful.

Nonetheless, I miss these kids and I sense the other girls do too. I stand by what I said, I definitely don't want kids with bad attitudes in the gym but when you work with a kid for so long, for them to just decide they dont want to try anymore is hard to take as a coach. I really try to stay positive for my other girls (two of whom are equally as talented to if not more than the two that quit) but it's very different in the gym. I just dont want anymore kids to quit but I know to be true to myslef as a coach I can not change what Im doing as a coach. In the end, I know the kids that truly belong on the competition floor will stick through the tough practices and do well.

-flipper82

[Mossy]

Well our gym isn't very hardcore but we have a few ground rules set in place to deal with things like this. If a kid isn't working hard or is being a huge distraction they are sent home. If they are sent home a second time in a month they are given a 1 week break from team, and if it happens a third time they are gone from team. Some times if you have trouble makers its best to get them out of the program before they start bringing down the other kids. I don't like giving up on anyone but I've come to realize that I have a big team and if they are making that big of an impact on training the whole "greater good" theory comes out. Gymnastics is a tough sport and if a child isn't ready mentally or can't become ready they will never be successful. We've actually thought of bringing a sport psychologist in to help the girls get over fears and help them with mental prep. But I don't know if we're quite ready for that step yet.